Why Do I Write?

"One Little Step At A Time...."

So I get the news last night that a college friend of mine is deciding to step off the social network scene and concentrate on constructing and working on her new blog. I think this is a great idea, yet feel sad at the same time. So, I started thinking to myself...."Why do I write?" Quite a few other questions and contemplation popped into my head as well but this is where I want to start for now.

I started my own blog(s) after reading others, finding out that it could be good for my business (and being a free service isn't a bad perk), and finally the pull into writing again really hooked me into blogging. I wasn't sure how I was going to do, if I was going to stay consistent or not, how often would I be writing, etc....so many questions, and yet forging ahead with my decision to blog. I started out with a business blog, which shortly after I shut down my first website; I had jumped the gun and wasn't totally satisfied with the services I had available for my site, so the decision to take a "time out" came after much deliberation. Did it hurt me to make such a business decision? No-if anything came of it, it was peace of mind that I didn't have to stress about what my site was and wasn't doing. I could pull back and continue with a clean slate.

Blogging didn't stop there for me. I went on to create a page that speaks of who I am as a mother, how I manage to stay at home with my child-soon to be two children, how I find time to create, let alone write, and how I manage to keep my sanity to a level only I seem to understand. Many entries and projects have gone onto the cyber canvas to let readers in on who I am and how I operate. I got involved in a creative project for the 2010 year, of which I've been struggling at times to keep up with it yet finding my own way through the process. Trust the process.....words to live by....

Who I am as a mother, urban homesteader, independent business woman only scratched the surface for me. As I've been going through the creative projects each month since January, I started to feel a stirring of sorts. I know who I am as the many hats I wear within a day but who was I to myself? I wrote in high school, worked my passion for art into sketches that most are but a memory of yesterday, and then with my four year committment for my undergrad degree, the writer emerged once again. The artist-the creatress, came forth as well. Four years came to a close, I chose a different career path which radically changed my life, struggled for what felt like an eternity, and in the process, found myself morphing into a mother....the emotional changes, let alone physical and mental were the greatest challenges I have learned to come through since my college days of endless studies and mountains of papers written to turn over for credits....little did I know....

So, now as the author of three blogs, a mother of one soon to become two, urban homesteader, independent business woman, freelance writer, artist, creatress, thinker.....I could go on; I look at the importance of why I write, who I'm writing for, and what I have to say. Yes, I've been on the social network scene for a bit of time now but I have been questioning its importance. Yes, I've reconnected with friends, which is great but how important is that arena to me, really? I can do without it; I don't play games or copy and paste numerous posts to catch the attention of friends. Some postings are wonderful, great ways to converse but some are just not necessary. I can stay connected to friends and the few family members through emails, phone calls, and maybe even the occasional visit; those things in life are not extinct, at least not yet.

Rainy days are great for relaxing with a book, playing with the kids, taking an extended nap, and the creative process of placing words down from the thoughts that loom at the forefront of the mind. I write to share what's going on, be it from ideas that manifest into something tangible, what's for dinner, creative projects, time with my little one, random thoughts, business, homesteading......giving my perspective on the world and how I choose to live in it.

~Mom

Choices

"In an age when we are told that good mothering is just a matter of finding the right sitter and learning how to arrange "quality time," most of us could never have invisioned how completely we would be taken delicious minature people." ~Linda Burton

Prayer

"God is not a cosmic bellboy for whom we can press a button to get things done." ~Harry Emerson Fosdick

Wednesday Creative Project

"Off to the hose for water..."

"I might need some help...."

"Urban Homesteader......"

"How about a clean driveway?"

Here we are, a beautiful sunny day in Vermont! Perfect gardening day, and I think we made the most of the morning. I decided at 7:15 AM today that going outside would be the best idea after a day of what appeared to be chaos from yesterday. You know, those days when you clean an area and your kids come through and bring you back to the starting point all over again? Yeah, it was one of those Tuesdays; this was after a great morning at the library and wandering through the produce section of one of the local markets to identify foods....of course, we had to look at the "organics" section as well.....

This morning, we spent time digging in the dirt, planting seeds-turnips & early greens with pumpkins, melons, cucumbers, tomatoes, herbs, etc...in containers to wait until mature enough to plant and especially after the last spring frost. Yes, I plant the old way-lunar calendars, farmer's almanac, and sage wisdom from people I've known my whole life to propagate food from the soil. Tristan planted pumpkin and watermelon seeds, watered everything he could pour water on-including the driveway-and played with his trucks while I worked the soil to plant grass seed in bare spots, turn the soil over, work on the compost pile, and till over in my head how to better manage things. We tried potty training right there on the back porch, had three accidents, ate lunch outside, and came in to clean up, read books for nap time, and when I heard the snoring of a toddler snuggled in my arms, I knew that I did the right thing by making the morning an outside learning experience.

After a short rest stop for me, cleaning the house (I always leave it for the afternoon because our morning hours are focused on homeschool), laundry (I have a feeling I'm going to be going food shopping tomorrow and clothes are piling up), some research, and found a great way to make better use of my time. Thanks to a tip about schedules coordinating creativity, business, home management, time with the kids, and making time for yourself, I'm ready to bang out another schedule but this is a monthly set up; I already have a weekly schedule and a daily schedule, so I would say this makes sense. I was never one for schedules but once I signed on for my third attempt for an undergrad degree back in 2001, I managed to keep my spontaneous nature and learn how to schedule at the same time. Now, with being a parent, running my own business, and everything else I have on my plate, it comes in handy to schedule-I feel like my "free time" is spontaneous these days....oy! ~Mom

"Let each man exercise the art he knows." ~Aristophanes, 450 BC-388 BC

Wednesday Creative Project

Juice pops were on the list today for a creative project, working with materials from right here at home. Washed, recycled applesauce cups with a straw cut into thirds, a banana cut into thick slices, and orange and grape juice to make the main body of the pop.

Of course, as you can see, we had a couple of "floaters." For whatever reason, the grape juice pops ended up being interesting looking with their sticks kicked off to the side but I bet they're just as edible.

In the freezer, Tristan and I went outside to enjoy the wonderful weather we had this morning, once again after lunch, and we're on day two of no nap. I think nap time is going through another major adjustment due to the fact that his bed went from crib status to big boy bed by taking down the crib railing and putting up the toddler bed bumper. At least he's not falling out during the night onto the air mattress that I set up on the floor underneath the bed. The first night he rolled, bounced, and landed in the middle of the mattress-never woke up during this acrobatic feat.

Other notes, we're working on homeschooling and I think its going well. We have a schedule hanging up, a notebook to keep track of daily work, and my little sponge is quite the learner. I'm glad I made the decision to try homeschool, and hope that each day that comes, Tristan will continue to learn and flourish.

Fiber projects are coming together in completion. I have one I'm struggling with, so I set it aside to focus on others to give myself a break from racking my brain to figure this puzzle out. Writing is coming along, one step at a time like it usually does and I have no complaints.

Warrior Mom

-"Even the most courageous warriors need to remember this simple wisdom: there is a time to take on the world and a time to rest, replenish and reflect." ~Jillian Klarl

Back on Track

Wednesday is here, and today is our creative project day. Because of Tristan having been sick for almost five full days, I didn't plan ahead for today's project, so we're going to shoot from the hip. We did complete our April 2010 preschool homeschool chart, which now hangs on the wall above our reading chart and cork board that has paperwork we need to pay attention to for weekly stuff. It helps to keep in mind and on paper, a schedule that we can follow yet, I know that things happen and scheduling should always be flexible, especially when it comes to kids. You can plan until your last breath but there are times when the apple cart gets turned over and you have to set it back on its wheels, gather all the apples, taking care to set aside the bruised ones-hey, they make great pie....and then you pick up from there once again and move forward.

Thinking of the above metaphor makes me realize that time with your children is priceless, and every moment counts because you'll never get it back once it manifests and becomes a memory. Long before I became a mother, I felt like I needed a full schedule of "things to do" to keep from becoming bored; I often found myself wondering why I always felt like I didn't have enough time to really enjoy what I was doing. It was in the beginning of taking on my responsibility of being a new parent, even into my son's first year to almost two years of life, it was time for me to step back and take a good, long look at what I was doing, where I was trying to go, where I was really going, and what was really important for everyone involved.

I didn't have to accomplish everything I set my eyes on, don't have to manifest every idea I have at the moment into something tangible right away, and realizing that preparing my child for life was going to be the top priority and that everything else was going to have to come afterwards or drop off completely. Adjustment to motherhood has taken the better part of two years for me to really get a firm grip on, knowing that in my heart, I'm not in control. I etched out a mental list of things I want to do, not setting it on paper, and being happy with the results of going with the flow of life.

Love, ~Mom

Insight

"Let us accept truth, even when it surprises us and alters our view." ~George Sand

Coming Through the Dark of Illness

Wow....it has been quite an interesting five day chunk of time...Tristan got sick last Thursday and is now, on Tuesday, almost 100% again. The first day was spent throwing up, the second, third, and half of the fourth days were spent sleeping and feeding him to keep him hydrated, fed, and comfortable. Monday afternoon looked promising with the hope of at least 75% better and this morning he's really taken off. After FOUR bowls of dry cereal and watered down juice, his demand for food really came on strong, and with a light lunch, a walk down and back up the basement stairs, he's sleeping peacefully. This is the longest he's ever been sick, and just the idea of knowing someday I'll be rangling two kids through sickness-'cause they usually like to share what each other picks up when it comes to virus and bacteria pets....I didn't sleep hardly at all these past few days, so working on auto-pilot and knowing the coffee pot will be my best friend...whew....

My strawberry picker from last year; I can't help thinking of this year's season to come when we can go pick berries and make jam making, storing and freezing, and just snacking on a big bowl of fresh, yummy VT grown strawberries...I'm looking forward to it again this year. We might try to grow a few plants here at home with the edible landscaping project I have in rough draft but to truly appreciate the jam making and storing up of locally grown berries, we definitely are going picking again this year. Our season is soooo short here-only two weeks for the best crop options-one must take full advantage of such a short season. And to think, next year, I'll have two little sets of hands to help with the picking-eating, e'hem.....

My writing took a 24 hour break; I looked up a deadline, thinking it was within a day or two and come to find out-or possibly that it got moved back, who knows-its later than I thought it was going to be. Fine with me. I also looked into other opportunities to write and found quite a few. I've picked my arenas to write for, happy with the knowledge that most outlets I can write about the things I know and find things to write about that perhaps I'm limited in knowledge on, and be happy with non-pressure deadlines and recipients who are going to be happy with the final product that gets turned in. Ahhhhh.....I can breathe on this one, too.

Love, ~Mom

"You tell me who has to leave the office when the kid bumps his head or slips on a milk carton." ~Wendy Wasserstein

Memories of the Early Days

Issues with accessing my blog page, and finding myself having to sign in another route-huh? Seems there's another blog page attached to this one, which I've NOT authorized or set up; hope it's just a clitch that can be remedied, otherwise Momma ain't gonna be happy....

Tristan has been under the weather since Thursday and now seems to be on the road to recovery, just at a slow pace. The last time he was really sick, it was only for three days-now, we're moving into day five. He doesn't get sick save a couple times a year, that's it. He's pretty healthy, especially for a toddler who's around other kids a couple days a week.

Boy, does this picture bring back memories! He was little but didn't seem as little as most babies-not for almost nine pounds! He's always been content, not fussy except when he's hungry, which he still voices his "I want to eat!" when he's hungry these days. He still likes to cuddle, although its when HE wants to and has nothing to do with anyone else. Ahhh....those were the days and these are the days.....to remember.

~Mom

On My Way

"Oh, yeah, that's it-right there.....thanks Mom. A thumbs up for that great back massage/reiki session...."

I loved the Snoopy suit, even if Tristan only wore it for about a month before I handed it down to my youngest sister for her new little man-what a long time ago!

I've composed a list, and then some, and feel confident today as I continue to work on things I need to get done. Still staying off the social networking, and maybe even do it again tomorrow. I don't mind not being there, as I've got my hands full with tasks to complete and opportunities to continue looking forward to.

Tristan and I went to the library today, picked up some books, signed him up for next week's Easter egg hunt, and toodled back home to grab lunch and chill out before reading and settling down for a nap. We found some great books for him, especially the three on cd that I think he'll love. I found a great earthy kids sing along, and really hope he likes that, too. I'm thankful these days that he will nap for the most part, and learning to work around those days where a nap is just not going to happen, per the jumping and party-like cheeriness that undulates from his bedroom like the aroma wave in the Bugs Bunny cartoons.

Dinner has been started and fragrance of roasting chicken fills the kitchen air as I write this post. Tumbling plans for tomorrow's creative activity over in my mind like a load of clothes in the dryer, knowing that we're starting our freshly washed, and the results are pinned on light, airy, and warm-we want to avoid the shrunken wool sweater affect if we stuff the dryer and not pay attention to what gets put in there before hitting the go button.

My current research is beginning to blossom, and I'm happy and amazed at what I'm finding. Interesting history that I never knew about, let along paid attention to or looked for. It will be interesting to see how this all unfolds and works out. Speaking of writing, I still have an article to finish before the middle of next week but my priority for today is to sew and finish repairs to a fiber project so it can be on its way and off my list of "Things to Complete After a Long Weekend of Insanity." Yeah, that's the heading for one of my lists.....~Mom

Change

"It is never too late-in fiction or in life-to revise." ~Nancy Thayer

Play

"In every real man a child is hidden that wants to play." ~Nietzsche